i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
I went to go pee and found a strand of your hair wrapped around my penis.
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fun fact: Antibacterial soap will not take the combined smell of bbq sauce and vagina off your hands.
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
He pulled the washer 5 feet out from the wall screaming about quarters
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't save the phone numbers of guys I don't like. That way it's a surprise when a random number texts me and tells me I have great tits.
I feel like the universe head butted me in my balls. That hungover.
.... My lady balls. Cuz I'm a lady.
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
Doing laundry. My jeans from last night smell like chicken wings and motor oil.
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
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