craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
I'm like 99% sure I made out with Kevin Spacey last night. Not good.
He gave me the "I've pictured you while jerkin off" look
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
I may or may not be taking a bath listening to the Phantom of the Opera. This lovely moment brought to you by xanax.
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
I had a dream that I got you so wet that you flooded my apartment
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
Randomize
