WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
I'm not mad at you for letting me use my air mattress as a toilet, i'm mad at you for letting me lay back down on it.
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
my grandma just gave me a shoebox fulled to the top with tootsie rolls and condoms with a not that said "enjoy college, find a big cock" i'm not sure how I feel about this
This lady gave me four cups to go along with my gallon of daiquiri. Silly girl, all I need is a straw.
There are no winners in a lube eating competition.
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
And, by “make you dinner” I mean “have lots of sex and multiple orgasms.” So you should probably eat something and before you come over
And hydrate too
Randomize
