If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
I wish i could sleep and get drunk at the same time...those are my 2 biggest needs right now
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
apparently my insurance doesn't cover road head. Bummer.
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
REAL PEOPLE DRINK 3 BEERS ALONE WILL WATCHING THE LIFETIME MOVIE ABOUT PRINCE WILLIAM AND KATE MIDDLETON
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
Apparently he proposed after he saw me chug vodka out of a traffic cone.
I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
Apparently I'm a "fire hazard"
My Easter Basket from my parents consisted of one chocolate bunny and a massive amount of condoms and a single note saying "the pope approves of the use of condoms" love mom and dad
He's on the porch naked. Help.
I'm hearing voices and sirens. I'm scared. I heard a manatee out there.
Randomize
