can you come get me at the bar
ill be there in 10 min
can we stop off at build a bear on the way home
When I came home you were watching infomercials, eating croutons out of the box and salsa from a funnel. Well done.
I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
Lights are FLASHING. This just got REAL. CAPTALIZATION.
WE COULD TOTALLY DO ECSTASY AND GO TO THAT CAT SHELTER OFF OF BROADWAY.
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
I'm getting turned down for sex. Apparently my "sexual appetite" cannot be satiated even by a man who's such a deviant he went to prison for jerking off in his car.
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
Cuz I feel like I ate the whole candy isle at 7/11 last night and chased it with rum
You pretty much did tho
He came back with a Butterfinger and vibrator batteries. There's no refusing him now.
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
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