Having a random hookup so left but love u
I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
He told me he loved me mid lick. Anyone that can look at me from that angle, lick my vagina, and say they love me must absolutely mean it
Only way we know if he truly fits in is if we spill straight vodka on the floor and his first instinctnis to lick it up. Otherwise, gameover.
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
Anddon't worry about me I have my Darth Vader flashlight
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
I'm not letting you use my bathroom unsupervised anymore. You peed in the sink thinking it was a urinal...
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
Randomize
