I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
I introduced my face to asphalt last night. They didn't get along.
Manscaping on you would be like trying to clean up the oil spill with a dixie cup.
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
The chlamydia really affected his face.
I feel like telling him your vigina was older than him was not a good pick up line.
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
I think it's safe to assume that dad heard you lose your lesbian virginity last night
I swear she is the Mary Poppins of drugs
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
dude, there is no doorman in your lobby and the front door is locked
oh yeah, sorry he's up here at the party. coming now
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