you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
Vegas is awesome. Its like you have a kentucky accent girls automatically assume you don't have herpes.
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
I took an uber home at 6am. Went to Santanas, apparently they don't take american express. So the uber driver bought my burrito. Success!
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
Well, fuck this election. I'm getting drunk, regardless of who wins.
Randomize
