She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
Dude, the girl next to me just farted. Worst part, it smells like astroglide
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
Just explain how I got from the bar to a house I've never been in, waking up to a cop in uniform ripping a bong
Besides. I seriously had a dream that George W Bush came over and slapped some tabs down on my kitchen counter and said "let's get juiced.". It was a sign to not get too fucked up
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
The smell came through my closed door. His farts are made of rendered tires, and apparently, ghosts.
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me
I've been vomiting all day.
All day? It's 10am.
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
Im going to seductively wisper "that butters my biscuit" in your ear
Just saw a fat guy on a flower print moped. He's my hero.
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