Playing drinking games to Nancy Grace totally counts as "keeping up with current events.."
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
I'm alone drinking at the bar and the titanic theme song is on. This won't end well.
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
Either I'm still drunk or the right side of the bed is now the left side.
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
You are the ghost of drunk bitches past, present, and future.
I don't know what's wrong with me. The guy from bar rescue is making me horny
Randomize
