Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
Just got back from doctors appt. He lied. It wasn't a pimple on his dick.
Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
Dude i just want you to know that when i found you half your mustache was already gone. I didn't do it.
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
I woke up with a cutting board and a bag of uncooked pasta next to me.
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
i don't know what happened one minute im stumbling home drunk and the next im drinking pabst and smoking with a french guy ive never met named hugo.
Apparently I thought every drink in my house needed to have a buddy so I put some vodka in each one. Long story short being wasted at work because the gatorade you brought is 60% liqour is not a great idea.
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