Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
ok understand this, i didn't pay for your dinner bc you said i wasn't going to get a blowjob for at least a month... this isn't a mail-in rebate deal, you gotta pay upfront
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
Yeah? Well I'm currently predrinking downstairs in my room by myself. Absolut and water with a hint of mint because I'm using the glass I keep my toothbrush in. Fuck, you bitches better get off work soon.
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
Also I want everyone to be drunk at my funeral. Instead of wearing black just blackout. That way everyone can celebrate how fun I was
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
That falls under the "unwelcome penises" category. Also that's definitely a sentence I never thought I would say
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
Drunk me just want to text sober me for saving that half rack of ribs I loves you
Randomize
