Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
They only remember me when they're drunk...I'm like a suppressed memory.
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
We've been friends for six months, when do my benefits kick in?
He booked us a hotel at a resort in cancun for sprng break... I just wanted to get laid this weekend when i was blackout i didnt know it was gonna spiral into a mess of events like a 5 month in advance commitment
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
who the fuck is meatball and why is he telling you to nap on the bar
Are you awake? I feel like I need to confess my sins to someone not on this side of the country.
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
My car insurance payment showed up today, so no inflatable hot tub for now. Sorry to disappoint.
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
I'm eating chicken wings naked and hungover at 10am... Happy bday to me
is it fun? or sober?
Wait, you met him on Onlyfans? The guy from last night? Which one of you is the fan?
Because one of you banged your stalker
Randomize