I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
I mistook a propane tank for a keg.
After four attempts, his condom would not flush. I had to remove it with salad tongs.
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
Don't let her tell you any different. She licked the balls of my hamster for that $100. It was a group bet. She won.
P.S. It's common courtesy to let the girl your banging know if she's about to walk into the same place your girlfriend is at so she can get her poker face ready
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
It's gonna be ok. As we grow older we sometimes lose sight of what's important to us. Like safe sex. And standards.
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Someone's gotta tell him drunk sex comes before dating
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
Randomize
