guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
Thats why you always identify the subtext of a blowjob before you accept it.
My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh god I can't handle any more dudes. I just walk of shamed to work wearing a guy's boxers and a life jacket. This summer is going to kill me.
Apparently I told his new girlfriend to stop swallowing because she's getting fat. Oh, and I yelled this across a large room
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
I'm definitely going to class still drunk right now and the freshman dressed as Hugh Heffner last night is texting me. I can't handle this.
I'm taking tokes in the bath tub, come if you want, I'm naked and you have to bring chicken nuggets or else you can't come in
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I saw a spider on my bed and my first reaction was to throw my weed bag to safety
Are you drunk texting me again or are you just being your regular stupid self?
yes
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
You know tonight's gonna be a good night when your already planning on sleeping in a trunk
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
Speaking of dumpster fires, your ex tried to add me on Facebook
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