So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
I was about to send you a concerned-for-your-safety text b/c it took you more than ten seconds to respond to a text that mentioned both the bar and lesbians
It feels like im being cuddled by a thousand little smurf vaginas
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
I am just pathetic enough to be sitting on the couch with my cat drinking absinthe and vodka watching moulin rouge. Hello, tuesday night.
I'm at work, and just realized I the beer smell I keep getting random whiffs of is my bra. I fail at life.
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
What did he say?
NOTHING. GODDAMN HIM AND HIS MAGICAL PENIS!
then he told me my boobs feel like "if you put mushroom soup in a baggie." I don't know how I'm supposed to feel about this.
Which one of you fucks put a bounty out on my brother's virginity?
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
Randomize
