White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
Passing out is just my bodies way of protecting my liver.
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
I'm having mini little movies in my head. Like for example. You were talking to a blue whale with jazz man sunglasses, but not the ray charles jazz sunglass. More like sunglasses that are round. Anyway, he has a baguette and stupid french hat. And you , you had your harry potter glasses.
adding to the list of how to lure in freshman boys: take dogs for a walk, yell at them from across the street, sit on the curb at 3 in the morning sobbing
New rule. No seeing movies about plane crashes after killer bong rips
Can't. Busy recovering from the worst pulled muscle of my life that I got either from excessively acrobatic boning or carrying a huge fucking ice luge down the street while wearing 4 inch heels
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
Your uterus is safe from my father's misconstrued prophecies.
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
Randomize
