There's a hobo dancing by himself. Is anyone going to ask how he got in the house?
i wish there were pregnant emoticons
Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
she danced around my room naked waving around the gold trojan magnum condoms singing "i have the golden ticket."
little did she know i was taping her the whole time.
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
I can't believe you're fucking in the bar bathroom, but everyone else can, and they're really proud.
Everything tastes like Lysol. Am I dying?
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
Dude. That Grinch had his priorities right when he was worried that there might be a cash bar at that town celebration.
Side note: I just realized that I can make my hand warmers double as a heated push up bra.
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
Randomize
