i passed out on the floor in my hallway and woke up with my dog licking himself 2 inches from my face. my first reaction? envy
i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
On the one hand, she would be the biggest mistake of my year. On the other hand, she's here and drunk.
you're close to getting here right? Because if you're still not here and I have to get dressed to answer the door for the pizza guy, i'm tipping him $100 on your credit card to spite you
I'm glad the dog doesn't judge me for doing leftover lines and watching George of the Jungle at 10 am
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
I'm sober in pajamas at a bar. Nothing is ok about that statement.
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
The feeling are messing with the penis
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
Damn victory sex feels great
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
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