I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
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this morning your mother said to me "sorry to have to meet you like this, in my sons bed" later she said "you never know whos gonna be in there. its scary sometimes"
i just saw you make out with a girl with facial hair...just thought i would document that in case you forgot
his eyes are fucked up, he bumped into the cabinet while standing in my office, and he's pounding chicken soup, and he must have chewed on 8 pieces of gum before he got here.
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
I think people like me is why alcohol became illegal at one point
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Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
so on a scale from morning glass of wine to that time i burnt the garage down how drunk were you last night
About 'lets tie a boat to a truck and ride it down the freeway'
Can’t fucking wait for Tuesday night. Have another situation that popped up. I swear my life is like a cross between a soap opera and a porno
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