You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
I'm sorry my penis didn't work
I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
tell ils to like buy her flowers and like a balloon that says, sorry I tried to fuck your sister. I think hallmark makes some of those cards too.
My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
all I'm saying is that my epic blow jobs have made grown professional football players cry in ecstasy
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
As I came the Sportcenter app played that "dah nuh nuh" chime. Top ten life highlight?
I'm so hung over that I just tried to send you a screen shot of the cracked screen on my phone.
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
Randomize
