At a straight bar and poker face just came on...must...resist....urge to gay it up
Why would that come on at a straight bar? I thought they just played Don't Stop Believin and Wonderwall on repeat
Anddd after the worst sex of my life, he said.."do you mind taking off the condom, tying it up, and throwing it at the door?" Weird.
So im going to watch Hocus Pocus in my footie pajamas... How am I in college?
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
the fucking easter bunny is here. he just made 3 cups in a row. no one knows who he is..
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Setting up an obstacle course with ladders, hurdles, and a spring board to the pool. you down for drunk races through it later?
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
I think I fucked up my elbow when I tried to fight off the paramedics.
Some girl is sitting topless in the kitchen and having a Skype video chat with some guy. I already like it here.
Had a dream I dropped the L word and immediately threatened to kill myself
You probably shouldn't be having nightmares about expressing affection
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
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