grilled cheese. we just shotgunned grilled cheese.
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle
I was asking the bouncer, "if I fall will you catch me?" which then turned into "if I jump off the roof will you catch me?" He said no.
Just got a blowie during the Avengers. It's weird knowing that the high point of your life just happened.
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
Accepting his friend request would be the Facebook equivalent of pity sex.
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
It's less than a hour into 2020 and I already want to punch some people in the face
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
Randomize
