no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
Dude, this place has 10% alcohol beer on tap. It's like God's semen.
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
Minus the pink eye. Do I look fuckable tonight?
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
I guess, just don't make it awkward
MY FUCK BUDDY'S MOTHER FRIEND REQUESTED ME! IT'S ALREADY AWKWARD COREY
And then he serenaded me with "Pimps don't cry" from 'The Other Guys'. If that's not love I'm not sure what is
If we had a dog do you think we would be less hoe-y?
Nah
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
We played wedding bingo. I made out with the maid of honor and fucked one of the bride’s sorority sisters. But I needed to get with the groom’s cousin, a mother-in-law to be, or the wedding planner to win and I came up short.
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
Randomize
