I'm drunk at The Bachelor casting call in Cleveland
I cherish every text you send me
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
I'm going to replace you with a friend who will be happy when I find a huge penis
I just tried to text you by typing "whoa" into my contacts.
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
All I want to do is sleep. And If I'm not sleeping, I want to be eating or fucking. I'm pretty sure being pregnant has turned me into a dude.
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
My mother just set me up with the son of the man I fucked last weekend. I could crawl under a rock and die OR I could remember the rules of genetics and hope that JR takes after daddy. Wish me luck...
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
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