so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
just to let you know, don't open your linen closet for a while until i come over with a cleaning kit and geek squad
I've come to accept that no matter where I step in our apartment, your underwear will be there.
She's like a connoisseur of porn. Her collection has things in it I never even knew existed. She even has an Italian batman porno. Where has she been all my life?
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Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
I think he was trying to tie my clitoris in a knot with his tongue. So awful.
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
Dont even get me started. you fell asleep in my kitchen after being cockblocked when you tried to use my roommates bedroom.
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Yeeeaahhh, I'm in no rush to dismiss a level 6 booty-call that pays my bar tabs and understands my Harry Potter obsession.
I feel like shit, and I can't get the band aids off my nipples.
Ted is on HBO in 20 minutes...not sure if this or the drunken dance party I had at the bar to a N*SYNC Christmas song 20 minutes ago is the highlight of my week so far.
I have fence marks all over my body
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
My mom just asked me if I knew what Buzzfeed was. Then said she's watching the second Magic Mike for the bodies. Please help.
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