i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
He was sucking on my finger.... and it was at that moment that I thought: Man. I wish I had a penis.
So apparently vaginal secretions are not covered under water damage insurance for my cell phone
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
These People Are The Epitome of Lazy
Also, we should really buy some bandaids. Right now I'm using toilet paper and scotch tape, but I don't really think that's sanitary.
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
He says he invented a new sex move called The Redbird that we can only do when I'm on my period. Should I be concerned?
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
Disturbing Scenes People Witnessed As Children
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
Is it bad I'm drunk at orientation
You've been there for 12 hours, what are you supposed to be doing
Not be drunk
He wore the same cologne as my orthodontist so all I could think about was how I hadn't worn my retainer in months
I think I heard my penis growl. Wanna do lunch?
He's my favorite late night booty call. He lives next to a Wendy's.
So you broke your ribs while fucking? Dude you just got about 25% hotter.