P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
Haha you were definitely messed up. Let me know if you need anything
Could really use a time machine and a higher self esteem, in that order
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He took the bartender's challenge and took a Jello shot with a tarantula frozen inside.
We invited our waitress tonight to come too.... we told her she had lightning in her veins and in return she taught us a Texas Roadhouse dance so the logical next step was invite her to a kegger.
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
Company sent me first class out of state, got so drunk on the plane I started handing out pillows and blankets to the people in coach
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
DUDE. HOLY FUCK MY PRINCIPAL WAS JUST MY UBER DRIVER. I AM LITERALLY TRAUMATIZED. ANS DRUNK. HOLY FUCK OMG
She's eating hot cheetos out of the bag with chopsticks, Matt, how is she NOT my soulmate?
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
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