does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
you ate skittles off the table like a hungry hungry hippo. it was awesome.
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
just peed on my foot to get a spider off. that lazy.
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
she said I was laying next to a garbage can in the subway doing key bumps and screaming "its my fucking birthday" repeatedly
I've been called an asshole for a lot of things in my life, but I never thought it would be because of potatoes
He keeps bees of course he's weird
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
I just realized how terrible that was... I was drumming on your penis to a song about Baby Jesus.
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
Just remember I’m your roommate with extremely questionable morals
Exactly, what could possibly go wrong
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