I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
This frat boy drinking a forty and wearing a pussy patrol shirt just ran out in front of my car. I should have used less brakes.
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
The highlight of your blackout was when you drunk showered with the garden hose and emailed your boss your vacation requests for the next year.
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
I lied. Can't workout today. Only exercises I'm currently capable of doing are breathing ones to keep last night's drinks ending up all over the classroom.
Dude true life I died at the derby...I lost everyone I knew, went down a bourbon and mud slip and slide, lost my hat, fell off the roof of a porta potty, sprained my ankle and knee and then got arrested.
I need to mount that unicorn and turn him into a full blown steed.
Idk I'm drinking Sam Adams and wearing new balances so I'm basically a dad
I'm wine drunk & this is not good news for anybody
I screenshoted his dick pic the other day because it literally looked like a brontosaurus. Like that really tall dinosaur that eats grass. Like I wanna draw a face on it.
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
Randomize
