Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
a 6'8" white kid in a Lin jersey just wandered out of my gay kid brother's room. when does spring break end, again?
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
I really want to text him and congratulate him on having a bigger penis than the guy I dumped him for, but I thought that might be awkward...
Only you would have to block the fucking governor of Tennessee from reading your tweets
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.
I just want to give face wipes a shout out for being there when im too tired or high to wash my face at night
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
I was afraid I was gonna get a URI, so I peed on his front porch.
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