I climb out of my sunroof. I mean its kind of embarrassing but part of me feels awesome and ninja like.
don't bother texting me at 10. my pants WILL be off and I'm not putting them back on to come see you.
Have you seen my high heels that I wore out?
You mean the one that you threw at the parked cop car or the one in the microwave?
what has two thumbs and is going to bang you boss on monday?
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
She kept sniffing my sweater and tried to guess what type of detergent I use.
Why am I the only one golf clapping for the vomiting girl on the train who just fell of her seat into her own vomit
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
The best thing about last night is when drunk Lauren asked cop if she could smoke a joint in front of him. And next thing I remember she’s smoking weed with a cop. How awesome is that.
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