You're the end to all my bad dreams.
Did you have that reoccuring dream about me banging your mom again?
Lady came into work yesterday. Full on stache and beard. I've never concentrated on making eye contact harder in my life.
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
Can we just ponder our lives for a second.
No I think my brain may implode in a puff of cocaine and sparkles.
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
I consider any night I don't make out with someone a bad night. So I've been great.
Doug will be the one to get my vagina. I don't know when or how but I'm now declaring that it is his. And he better not disappoint.
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
My liver needs me to go back to work asap.
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
Matt is trying to convince me that we have a deal where if I show him my tits he won't do cocaine. Apparently we shook hands on it?
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