i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
i just shit 3 out of the 4 types of matter
I'm relatively certain my chiropractor just judged me for admitting that my back is misaligned from the sex we had last night...
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
I just had a flashback of 4:30am: me hugging the toilet bowl and you handing me a jar of pickles to open. There is something seriously wrong with us.
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
You've never really lived until you tell someone you have an STD over snap chat.
Can I come by? I want you to meet my squirrel
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
Tom just texted me he's Tindering from his hospital bed while they're running heart tests on him.
That's dedication to the game.
Today, this cop risk his life to save me from a sink hole but all I could do is laugh, I was so stoned
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