just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
Sometimes I think that I have too much self esteem
Then I realize that I'm just really fucking pretty.
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She gets me. First thing she said this morning "I'll buy breakfast if you can tell me my name."
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
Bartenders are not toys. I repeat, bartenders are not toys.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
Hey, I'm renting a storage locker for the summer to keep all my bondage shit in so my parents don't see it. You wanna split on it for your all your weed shit?
I told her shower beers are even better when you have someone in there with you and she said she's been looking for a new drinking buddy. It's a goooooo
And, omg, my eyelids are on fire. I think the internet let me down. :(
She puked in the bed, peed in the closet, and woke up on a Rubbermaid in the closet under the stair case
For some reason, my alarm clock was unplugged & in the kitchen microwave. I don't remember doing that...
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