wake up i wanna do it froggy style
I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
So I'm driving and this guy next to me at the stop light is reving his engine and honking at me. Motherfucker thinks that's because I'm asian and drive a honda I'm automatically going to race him
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
the girl next to me in class is drinking a margarita out of a slurpee cup. i know your going to ask how i know its a margarita and the answer is i can smell the tequila. i never want to leave this place
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
I seriously just drove by a man walking down the street wearing hospital scrubs, an 80s track jacket, gold necklace and carrying a flute.
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
We were so sore from having sex that we decided to fix it with more sex. It's the hair of the dog for sex hangover.
That was the first time I ever heard of a female getting road head while driving... thanks for the memory and making me happy ending..
The worst thing about buying this extremely comfortable bed is that once I get a girl into it, all she wants to do is sleep. I want my fucking money back.
Randomize
