even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Had no idea what his name was when I woke up. Went through his desk, found his tax records. Ben. And loaded.
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
He's the first man I've met that knows more about Harry Potter than I do. He shops at Goodwill and has a Game of Thrones cookbook in his apartment. This is my soulmate.
sooo the guy I beat last night in strip pong is the manager's husband at my new job...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
Tequilla is a sneaky bitch ninja that doesn't kick in until you least expect it. Then BAM! You're peeing in unconventional places.
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
He told me their parents think of me as the "drunk friend"...oddly enough, I'm ok with that
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