did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
STOP CALLING ME LADY CHLAMYDIA
I text him "Dude. Tryna get fucked here. I only have half the parts. I need your help" I'm sure my mom would be super proud of the woman I have become.
Please warn me if you ever end up in porn, cause I don't want to stumble across that on accident, okay?
I can measure my amount of vomit in solo cups.
I don't know what happened this summer, I've lost my sense of morality. All I do now is work, get drunk, and have sex near national landmarks.
We exchanged snapchat usernames instead of numbers. Is that what America has come to?
I got into a fight with the dude who fell asleep on my couch bc he wouldn't wake up but managed to get a lunch date set for thurs with another guy by the time he finally left. So how's your day so far?
Hey, how are you?
No. You're dead to me, you hamster stealing slutbag.
I woke up to both of you drawing on me in sharpie, unless a glorious threesome was had the night before that is not okay.
Who says it wasn't?
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
Randomize
