Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
He belongs with you like a mcdonalds playground belongs in Chernobyl
dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
when the police officer said he was gonna take a picture of the car accident, you asked if you should pose on the hood
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
Steve just broke his bong and some kid in an american flag bathing suit and no shirt just fell down the stairs. Its dangerous here
That's the kind of break up sex that keeps couples together. Damn.
I may have made out with a tranny last night, which, if I don't get fired for everything else that happened, really makes last night epic.
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
so "excuse the stench" wasn't the correct thing to say when your boyfriend's parents walk in on you shitting. Live and learn
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
well I've taken an Uber to my weed dealers twice in the past 2 weeks so it's going well since I sold my car
It's my day off, I'm going to Target to check out Moms in yoga pants
I have to stop at Sheetz to put my bra back on before I meet you hold on
Randomize
