You just made me feel so damn special
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
she just uttered the sweetest sentence in the english language...my stripper friends are coming over
Dude turns out her best friend is lesbian...there is no wingman for this situation
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
I know that was a dream because I woke up and there was no pizza
The hookers weren't a dream get tested
New low: falling asleep with my face in the toilet only to be awoken when my hand slid down and touched the water. It's moments like these I wish I could forget.
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
1. so the new neighbor u called dibs on.. I'm sorry..but not really. 2. She lactates, I guess that happens when you have a kid less then 5 months ago.... WTF!! 3. Is it fucked up I'm craving Ceral & Milk now?
I don't want to just break his heart, I want to dip it in liquid nitrogen and then smash it until it's powder and snort the powder
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
Yeah but the jokes on her right? We just got a new couch and hers still has a cum stain on it from like six months ago
On another note, I kinda only wanna poop laying down now
It was some weird herd predator-evasion instinct. All 15 of us took off running in different directions, and the two cops just stood there, perplexed. They had no idea who to chase.
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