"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
he keeps calling me but I'm too scared to answer... Not sure what he's gonna yell at me for: barging into his room while he was with another girl, filling her shoes with dog food and water, or hiding his keys in the garbage disposal.....
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
pretty sure I offered to blow her dad. she's not speaking to me & he won't stop winking at me.
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
Won't anyone wonder why I'm mute, bald, and wearing an eye patch?
We made a bet that we had to talk like Yoda all night at the bars
Oh by the way, john gave me your shirt to return to you when I was at work today. I almost gave him his girlfriends underwear to return to her but figured it would be inappropriate.
He's bought his dick a cell phone. A cell phone. For his dick...
He gave me the number and told me that I if I want to hook up again, I have to call his penis.
Nothing says I've got my life together like vomiting on the groom and passing out at your youngests sisters wedding
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
At least you didn’t announce to an entire bar you’ve eaten pussy, and then knocked your beer over.
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
Give me like 5, I have to feed a moose and find my pants.
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