Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
This is worse than the time I broke into Subway to steal bread.
Apparently I was trying to convince him Springsteen has had buttsex. I ended the argument with "I bet he came from it too."
We did however see an 87 year old guy die and get resuscitated last night at the bar. He then finished his beer and his game of pool.
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
He said i looked like a shooting star sprawled out on the floor while i puked and i kept blaming "senor cuervo" for doing me dirty.
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
Turns out floaties are a great thing after a couple bottles of vodka
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
Just got a snapchat from him that was a video of with the caption "my new apartment" in Brazil. I think we might not be seeing eachother anymore.
Because you hugged a homeless guy, and I paid him 5 bucks to give us our giraffe balloon animal back. That's why.
I balled in the shower for 20 minutes, rolled up to the meeting late looking like a gremlin, and my one night stand was standing there in a suit
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