the best part was when he threw his debit card on the table, looked at everyone and said "turn this into pizza!" It felt like a scene in a 'coming of age' teen comedy.
I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
Just made my alarm the Lion King song. Too excited about waking up to sleep.
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
he had the kids march single file in front of us on the way home so they didn't have to watch him pulling me passed out in their wagon...
I woke up this morning with a wristband and I thought I went to the hospital last night I actually went ice skating instead
They're showing aladdin at the bar my birthday is complete
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
I woke up in a chipotle parking lot with an industrial sized box of condoms and a bag of dounut holes. I need Jesus
Wait..I'm drunk and butt naked making a pizza. Happy Wednesday.
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
Randomize
