Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
Walked by a shop giving away free donuts this morning. Best walk of shame ever
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
Yeah when I texted her last night the only response I got was "stoned eating cobbler."
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
I just tried to snap you a picture of the CVS where we decided not to become parents.
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
Randomize
