I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.
Want me to give your number to an army recruiter?
I don't know... do you want me to use your number to sell used gay porn on Craigslist?
I sense beginning a prank war would end badly for both of us.
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
I was screaming out for people to gather the townsmen and the mayor so we could hang him
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
Found sauce from last night's pizza rolls wedged under my phone case... While sitting in my 8 am class. What happened last night?
Texting people and counting condoms..we have like fourteen. Goal for this week: use all of them
I know I drink too much cuz "ssssjllapph peneinssesss" automatically comes up in my phone now.
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
Randomize
