i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
She broke both of her ankles trying to jump off the balcony. it's like every time she drinks she makes even more impressively bad decisions than the last time
Do you think i can prewrite an apology on friday and leave it vague enough to just finish on sunday?
It's like leaving me for his wife wasn't enough. He had to give me an STD too.
Btw before you ask, the dr said there's no way shoving his dick that far down my throat is why i got laryngitis
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
I just almost said to a customer "P as in Pussy"
hey if you're going to the hospital do you wanna pick me up a taco on your way back
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
id like to think im the only pot dealing prostitute that is also an ordained minister. but maybe not. what a time to be alive
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
Randomize
