think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
I just smelled my beer. It smells like coming home.
so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
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oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
I wanted to take a shower but I forgot we made applesauce in it last night.
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
Stop leaving me alone with my ex boyfriends after keg challenges. Woke up in his bed covered in what you think would be cum. No...toothpaste. He left a note. "Be home at four. Don't be here when I get back."
if drunk means calling me and asking to borrow the game of life at 2am then I think you were drunk
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I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
It wasn't so much a one night stand as much as one night she puked on my nightstand.
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
I'm getting drunk by myself again. But I'm not shotgunning any of them. That's self-restraint, right?
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
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