I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
That's true. There's really no bad time to take a Vicodin.
It is the Reeses peanut butter cup of pharmaceuticals.
Nothing like an old fashioned, wine fueled, anxiety-cry in the shower to start off finals week.
It's 6 a.m. ... what the hell.
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
I couldn't sleep so I took 4 shots of vodka and promptly threw up in the sink. Happy Thursday
You don't realize it's a small world until your ex girlfriend's dad unintentionally messages you on grindr..what.the.fuck.
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
I took your mattress from your bed. Don't ask questions. Love you. See ya later.
My car windows are covered in lube. Happy 4th of July!
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
Randomize
