i just pissed myself at work. maybe they'll buy the old coffee spill trick
TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
19 Characteristics That Make People Instantly Attractive
i just remembered the time you guys tried to give me an intervention because i was drunk before 5 on a monday
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
Having drunken flash backs of me giving you a piggy back ride. I was like Jesus, and you were my cross. I fell so many times for you. This is true friendship.
disregard all texts ive sent you minus taco motherfucking bell
U know that drunk state, where at 930 the next morning your sitting in a bath in ur bathing suit trying to sober up...yeah. That's where i am..
25 People Confess What They’re Shamefully Attracted To
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
btw you left your chapstick on the nightstand and bruises on my body...
gifts from me to you. you're welcome.
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
So... How much of our rent is drug money?