If you did the rosary as much as you masturbated, you would be the pope
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just checked my phone. Sometime last night I googled sex positions in a tent. Was there even a tent there?
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
Your texting shows a blood alcohol level of .12
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm not gonna get my cat high anymore because what if he has a heart attack. I don't want to be responsible for that shit
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
Randomize