Not sure what happened last night, but there are four mini bikes outside and some guy is wearing my shirt passed out in the breakfast nook. Won't be telling the grand kids about this one.
At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
i guess i called my mom last night. she wasnt nearly as impressed with what we did in the bathroom as i was
Practice the "sorry I may have given you herpes" conversation with me before I call him and break the news
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
Just found out I reached my $2500 deductible and I have a $5 million dollar cap on my health insurance. Let's get drunk and do something recklessly stupid tonight.
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
The night took a downhill turn when he started using a butter knife as a spoon to drink his cosmo
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
Well. I have your keys. You have my car. Looks like we have a drunkxican standoff.
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
You yell at me for giving you beer but not for licking spilled beer off your chest.
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
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